Have you ever....

Have you ever been so irritated and pissed that you just wanna cry.. Haa. Perfect feel, especially when there's screaming and shouting the whole time at work. When I just didn't already feel right when work started, and with changes in the upcoming roster that just destroyed ALL your plans, and with patients screaming and shouting NONSTOP, and patients repeatedly asking you about how to write a letter and bla bla bla...... The list never stops. Just makes your head wanna explode, I swear. And each time you pick up the casenotes to note the changes and thought you can write some report, you have to put it back down already... Thanks to the docs who love delaying, and started the trend of leaving some patients to see in the afternoon. Thought there'd be some peace and silence in the staff toilet, but no, I was wrong. I still could hear the shoutings from my bloody ward. Fucked. Not only gives you a headache , but you just wish they have 'one tight slap - QDS/PRN' in the IMR.. Or better still, a 'discharge STAT' in the IMR~

Spoiled whatever mood I had left for Play-ing after work.. So we headed to nabins instead. But still, sorry but I just didn't feel comfortable. Hehh. And all that was in my mind was....tired. LOL!

I just wanna have a break. But unsure what is it that I want a break from exactly. What a joke.

generallyy......

My parents. Haa. Till this day I still wonder at times why they even gave birth to me. For me to be their ATM? Never in my life have they put in any effort and responsibility as who they're suppose to be. This picture was taken on the day that they've been waiting for all these year. For me to graduate and start working so they'll be able to draw money from me. Hoping that I'll be able to pay off their debts, buy them a house, give them money every month...... It's all about money if you realise. Ohgod. Since my early teen years, father's already been wanting to borrow money from me. Never did they give me the feel of home. Gambling, loansharks, drinking, smoking and EMAs....... But I'm happy I've a sister. Not so much to confide or to be there for. But to know that I've a sister, its just that simple, it makes me happy.

My aunts, and extended family on mother's side. I adore them. I truely appreciate having them. They'll be the ones who showed me what love is within a family despites some misfortunes here and there. Yes I might be rebelious and defying them most of the times, but that's part of growing up...

Ontop of all these people whom I've the same blood running in me...... There's my awesome frens whom I have fun with and can run to, who keeps me going at many times.

As I look at this picture, looking at these people... We graduated together, as frens who stuck together. But since then till now, so many thing's changed. Really. And like what hannah says, the not so long ago frenships.. Hmmm.....

To love life. That's what I wanna do.

Hell Unleashed.

Hell was let loooose today at work though there was government! (: Loved it baby! Did junior... Would have done better without e-charting. Hahaha! Anw that's not the point. Had loads of fun showering all those patients with SSN sue li..!! The whole chop chop attitude was damn funny.. And she came up with the idea of starting a car-wash business. LOL! Hmmm, even serving diet was hell fun the other time with her...

Tmr will be another awesome day at work!!! Not only will I be in the same shift as Hajarah, we'll be working together same team as well........ ;) We've been waiting for like forever for this day to come! For us to be in the same shift is already like one in a million la.. Wahahaha! On top of that, Eeling will be with us on shift as well... Yayy!

If work can be like that everyday, I'd be loving my job wholeheartedly mann! Woots~

Anw, this week and next week, they're gonna fly pass... Off here off there, batam, nights.......... Then it will be time for MOT, then back to ward for one week, and I'm off for THREE weeks baby~!!! (:

Whacki-ness

Gosh.. Last night was a whacky night with sheila and feeza after work. Shhh.... Love my bitches! And as for work, I just ask for the non-nursing personnels to appreciate us nurses at least that lil bit, that's all I'm asking for, is it too much..? Hehh. Work's not that bad other than that. Plus velvet couture have been keeping us going at work! Hahaha! Thanks to nadchok.. (:

Hmm, you know sometimes in life, you just want something so very much and it'll just be stuck in your head the whole time.. But when you're there, when you almost have it in hand, you doubt. Not knowing if you still want it anymore, you're fearful, and you go back and forth about your decision. Cause you know that there's no turning back. Once its gone, its gone, and you might just have to live with that regret or nightmare after that. It sucks to have to be making such decisions isn't it?

mindBLASTING..!!!

Ohmygod! Hahaha! Have been on msn with BG since 1pm.. Love it! OMG! This trip's gonna be so fun I swear. No elaboration here but ya~ LOL!!! And we've already came up with this 3d2n roadtrip down to taupo for the skydive, bungy and hotspring...... Weeeee~ 3 of us. How I wish it could be 4 of us. Haa! Okay.. Shh.

Clevedon oysters, dressmart, sylvia park, queenstreet, k'rd...... The list goes on and goes baby! (x Top notch excitement please. And when BG starts school in the second week, I might just get the bus pass and bum around north nz... Yeehaaa!!

Ahhh... I can't stop laughing from disbelief and excitement. Heeeee~ (:

&its nad chok's last cycle of night tnight and tmr before leaving us! Glad that I get to night with her at least once.. Its gonna be a hell of a night! (: and damn yana! She's on her 2weeks AL! Bleah. My turn soon..! Hahaha

Me.

Naturally I'll avoid and 'pull myself away' to a certain extent when I get uncomfortable with a group of people.. That's me. Haa.

Anywayy.... Interesting dinner with aunt just now. We were talking about studying abroad and starting a nursing home or something like that overseas. Planning this planning that... Joker sia. So basically I'll be the first to go over to work and get PR and study. Either aussie or nz. Then my cousin will come over after she's done with her diploma to get her degree in being a vet. Hahaha! Then by then my sister might wanna come join us after her diploma as well, to do her degree in early childhood. Reason there's no degree course to be a vet in sg and there's no career in sg to be studying early childhood. Laying all the possibilities on the table over dinner. LOL!

Best part best part!!! We were talking about huimin and her boyfren, then out of no where, my aunt asked me if I'm going nz this time to find bridget or to find boyfren. OMG!!! Taken off gaurd la I swear. Hehh.. What even made her think that I'm meeting anyone else besides bg.....

Bought some magner's before coming home~ Woots~ (:

My Hideout.

My aunt asked me this.. If I'd left anything or anyone behind in NZ, that made me keep wanting to go back there, besides BG. My answer: BG lorr... Hahaha! I just can't wait to be there again, it's became my 'hideout' kinda thing. Feels like i'm under the eagle's wing, safe and sound. And of cuz there's more to it~ (:

"You're dealing with someone who doesn't believe in marraige, and someone who doesn't have much faith in relationships. Hope you understand and all I ask for is to be patient with me.. Let me learn to love and learn to trust again."

And, dewali at priyaa's was great! Meeting all of them again was just a fuzzy nice feeling, just a little awkwardness here and there due to some problems. LOL!

my 100th crazy post.

I smell Vietnam and New Zealand babayy~!!! :D

Okay now I'm feeling super excited, but also kinda confused feel.. First of all, I'm going back to the land where so much craziness started earlier this year, which was just about 7 months back... And here I am also, thinking of hopping onto the south island tour, and even msg-ing verve on fb about it. Haa. WTH. I don't know how to feel mann, and what I want. But I know I really want a friend to come with me this time round..... But then again, who.. Lol.

Aiya, life's too complicated, so don't bother understanding. I'm crazy. I took mc today, my second day of course. Diagnosis: GE... Haa.

My dream is to fly over the rainbow so high

D&D and partying at Arena last night was a blast..!!! (: But the best of the best thing that's happened in a long long time is......... I've recieved a parcel from brigo!!! Woots~ *dances around the house*

Was just thinking about flying over to aussie to meetup with her in dec and poof, I've got something from her.. Hahaha! I miss brigo i miss brigo i miss brigo.

Anyway, in my opinion, i think the course that I'm scheduled to go to tmr is gonna be rubbish. Hehh.. And its at bloody paya lebar. WTF. Gotta go back ward to take nametag first. How dumb.. Haha.. As for work, people are constantly leaving... Just shows how great it is at work eh? And now its a real life example going on about how friends just can't work together. Especially when both their mindsets when it comes to work is different, and when one carry balls and the other doesn't. Politics are something I've never liked. 3years. 6months down, only. God bless me. Just need my AL soon and quick!

Love wise, I love my friends, alot. Other then friendship love... The others are too complicated to explain. Hahaha! Philipines or Australia? LOL.

"When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there.."